We Were There When… Gerry Duffy Taught Us How To Focus On What’s Right, Not What’s Wrong During COVID on The Coffee at Eleven Show

Gerry Duffy is a gentleman. A gentleman and a legend!

Starting out with a pathological fear of public speaking, Gerry has grown to become one of Ireland’s favourite Public Speakers and Trainers. And he took tome to share some of his wisdom with us when he  on The Coffee at Eleven Show, when he Taught Us HOW To Focus On What’s Right, Not What’s Wrong During COVID.

Very special lesson in this folks, take 6 minutes to check it out.

Ladies and gentlemen, I invite you to stick on the kettle, grab a coffee, grant yourself a few minutes of l’Oreal’ time (you’re worth it) and allow us to present you a very special “We Were There When…” moment.

We Were There When… Gerry Duffy Taught Us To Focus On What’s Right, Not What’s Wrong During COVID

Yours Truly: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, you are more than welcome to another episode of The Coffee at Eleven Show, brought to you on this beautiful mid-week morning here courtesy of WIG-WAM.ie SME peer support. Delighted in particular to have my friend for many years, delighted to say he’s my friend from many years, as a special guest. Very special guest this morning is Gerry Duffy. And I’ve got to ask Gerry to say hello and cheers us with your coffee mug.

Gerry: Does a glass count?

Yours Truly: That counts perfectly well, Gerry. That’s classic Gerry Duffy. I love it. Gerry, we’re going to go to Q and A, as I mentioned. And my last question, if I may, is one tip. What would you say to your nearest and dearest: “You’ll get through COVID, come out in great shape the far side by doing blah.” What’s the one blah for Gerry Duffy, please?

Gerry: Okay. So I remembered for … I got to give you a long answer to this one, so maybe two or three minutes, if that’s okay. And I’ve found it’s monumentally powerful and it ties into a chat Raymond and I were having, and a few people, just before we officially started. I I was on the internet four or five years and I saw this pretty powerful video where this person wrote up the nine times tables on a flip chart. So nine times one, nine times two, might be bringing back a few memories for a few people in the room. The maths, the maths exams. But anyway, they went down all the way down to nine times seven and then they wrote an equals, nine times one equals, all the way down to nine times seven equals. And then just start to fill in the answers from the bottom: nine times seven is 63, 54, 45, 36, nine times three is 27, 18, SEVEN.

And straight away, everybody of course, gravitates, “Wait a minute, you got one wrong.” But what it highlights for us is how we are conditioned to see or ignore all the things that were right instead of just one … So so many things might be right in our life, and yet one thing happens. And don’t get me wrong, I’m monumentally respectful of COVID and the impact that it has on so many people. But how much more difficult would be … So if nine times one is seven represents … because sometimes those things definitely do happen in our life, and we have a big nine times one is seven now, which is something that we don’t want. It’s not what we wanted to be. We want nine times two is 18 and nine times three is 27. So in order to help me get through it, I’ve learned the value, and we could bring this into, a gratitude attitude to recognize, yes, COVID is throwing us these challenges, but how much even more difficult would COVID be if nine times two was 17, and nine times three was 22? If those things weren’t right in our lives. So whatever nine times two is 18 represents, something is right in your life. Whatever nine times four is 36, whatever that represents in your life.

And I remember I was asked to work with this company a number of years ago, and they were all being made redundant. And I was very respectful of that. Very empathetic of that. But I asked them to imagine a scenario if they were going home to see evening, and they got a phone call and a phone call was along the lines of … And in this case, the nine times one is seven represents they are going to lose their jobs, which they were about to do. And they were very much challenged by that, which I totally respect and understand. But I wanted them to suddenly see, and maybe to understand that the power to help you get through this period of incredible uncertainty, like is, is the brain.

This is where we got to go, is to the brain, because the brain, when you think about it, drives everything. And so what I wanted to show them how was they could reframe the situation and suddenly realize they had this power to get through this period, even though it might have been so daunting. Because obviously they were thinking about mortgages and children and putting food on the table and all of the commitments and requirements that they might have and they needed a job for. And I got them to imagine a scenario where they’re driving home that evening … Sorry, walking by reception on the way home that evening. And the receptionist stops them, and these are the people that are all about to be made redundant, and they’re still at work, a few months away from being let go. They’re walking by reception on the way out that evening, and receptionist stops them and said, “Listen, there’s a phone call for you. It sounded urgent. You can take it in that room over there.”

So you go into the room, you pick up the phone, you hear a voice that you recognize, and this is what you hear: “Get to the hospital quick. There’s been an accident. Get here now.” I said to these people, all of whom were about to be made redundant, is it fair to say, if you got a phone call like that, you would suddenly become quite dismissive of the impact of losing a job? Because now something even greater is in serious jeopardy, because presumably this represents maybe a family member, which is the nine times two is 18. Maybe it happened that family member’s in great health. So how much more challenging would COVID be if all these other things were suddenly taken away from us? And what it’s designed to do for me, certainly, was to recognize, yes, at times of my life, things are going to happen that are not what I want them to be. Nine times one is seven.

But at those times to recognize and to practice outlining well how much more difficult would that be if I didn’t have all these other things that are right in my life. And that’s the power of framing, I believe, and that’s the power of gratitude . And how much more difficult would my business be if I didn’t have a roof to maybe conduct online sessions or whatever, and maybe to have the value that clients now still see in me, maybe to have a great partner that supported me in this period, food in the fridge. How much more difficult would it be if I didn’t have those things? So if I could harness the recognition that I do have these things, I believe will help me be stronger through the COVID period.

Watch the full interview here: https://youtu.be/EHO3U-gK9sA 

Connect with Gerry here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gerry-duffy-5483376/

The magic (and the hope) of live entertainment happens when all involved walk away shaking their heads in disbelief, dying to tell someone, “We were there when…” This cannot happen every time, even if the same people utter the same words time after time, as in a stage play that runs night after night, but it happens when a sprinkling of magic touches performers, crew and audience alike. And it happened several times on The Coffee at Eleven Show.

As we break for the summer, we thought we’d go back to the recordings and pull out a few of those moments where we can honestly and proudly say, “We were there when…”.

The plan is to share one “We were there when…”moment with you each week between now and September.

Come back next week for another installment of “We were there when…” from a guest who had Coffee with Colm on The Coffee at Eleven Show, brought to you by WIG-WAM – SME Peer Support


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